After last night's phone call, I've learned a little more about myself (and discovered some new and old things I need to improve on). I was expecting to explode on her last night, but it's a good thing that I didn't. We were able to talk things through and clear up what was causing the lack of the communication (or at least give me an understanding of it). While some of you don't think so, I think I did overreact yesterday. Yes, I understand and still agree that it is rude not to respond back to someone after a long while. But, I also have to learn that some people have a hectic schedule and sometimes, the best they can respond back is a little bit later. She does understand, however, that she made the mistake of assuming I understood her situation. She also promises to reply back whenever possible. However, I do have some things to reexamine and improve about myself:
- Whatever it is that gets pent up inside me, find a way to release it without causing any damage. Sometimes, it can be anger or frustration. Sometimes, it can be sadness. Whatever it may be, I need to find a way to just let it out.
- I need to refocus on developing my own means of happiness. I know that this one would be a little tough for me. I like to be around people (most of the time). I like to connect with people. I get a lot of happiness when I interact with others. But, because I drew such a large amount from others, it leaves me no chance to discover what I can do by myself to unwind and find my own center of self contentment. Maybe I do need to buy a TV and play videogames again.
- Understand that the world doesn't revolve around me. I've been pretty good about this until recently. And I don't want to lose sight of who I am in a world of others. Everyone has their own life situations to take care of. I can't be selfish and demand their attention whenever I please and expect them to drop whatever it is they're doing. There's been a while where I hated to communicate with people because I hate bothering people. During that time, I also openly accept others who wished to interact with me. I need to find a balance in between.
- Understand that even when I haven't heard from someone for a while, it doesn't mean that they are ignoring me. This one was probably the thing I realized last night. This goes back to the previous point where people have their own life to tend to, and sometimes, they simply are running around trying to complete so many tasks at once.
I also need to work on my patience. I strive on being patient with people, and I at least hope people can be patient with me. We're all a work in progress. But we're all also in this together.
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